I would never try to like everyone. That sounds like a nuisance.
[ she would never want to be like sidon or rosamund. ]
There are those I dislike because of how they behaved and spoke to others. The only person I don't like because of how they spoke to me is Sora. [ a beat. ] Or whatever her name is now.
[ there is also a significant difference in just learning about the death after the fact, and witnessing it happen in person. it was, in fact, quite gruesome! it is really a shame that almost everyone who knew were the shots were kept were the ones who needed them. ]
It is still not pleasant to witness. Even with us-- we all died, and are still able to interact and have a chance to return, but the experience of it all likely traumatized many, even if they try to hide it.
[ the deaths were violent, but it would have been worse to see all of them bleed out and die one by one.
she looks thoughtful. ]
It is more difficult to watch people die, but I talk to those who are dead more than I do with those that are alive. [ she knows she doesn't have a normal view of things. ] Grief takes hold of people in various ways. I've witnessed it enough, but even I don't know how deep it go for some.
That's fair. While I do have some guests that stay long term, most of them I only see for a few nights at most... two months consequently with this many people is odd.
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I do not think it is hard to guess.
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That is fine. There is nothing wrong with disliking someone.
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[ she would never want to be like sidon or rosamund. ]
There are those I dislike because of how they behaved and spoke to others. The only person I don't like because of how they spoke to me is Sora. [ a beat. ] Or whatever her name is now.
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[ kind of funny. ]
But I do not think it is healthy to force yourself to be in the company of those you do not agree with.
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[ she's sure she'll cough up telling petals. ]
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... was yesterday fine, despite the unease?
[ he is thinking about the cyoa return. ]
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Most of them came back more tiresome than not. It is easier to accept their deaths, knowing they will return, but...
[ even if she has seen too much death before coming here, she is still young. ]
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It is still not pleasant to witness. Even with us-- we all died, and are still able to interact and have a chance to return, but the experience of it all likely traumatized many, even if they try to hide it.
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she looks thoughtful. ]
It is more difficult to watch people die, but I talk to those who are dead more than I do with those that are alive. [ she knows she doesn't have a normal view of things. ] Grief takes hold of people in various ways. I've witnessed it enough, but even I don't know how deep it go for some.
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[ honestly, they've seen it enough times here, the way people react to it. some more calmly than others. ]
You never know until the moment comes.
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[ she sighs and looks to the side. ]
... I felt too much and hollow at the same time.
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Is it always bad? When it feels like that?
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Sometimes, I am tired.
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[ ... ]
But it is easier to deal with? Even somewhat?
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Every now and then. Recently... it's both easier and more difficult.
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Difficult because you are not used to treading on this sort of ground?
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Forty... is a number I shouldn't comprehend.
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[ she can escape for some alone time. ]
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