If there's a way for you to come back with me to Teyvat, you are welcome.
[ but the last they spoke of this, she'd said she hadn't wanted to abandon her duty. which is unfortunately something he can also understand, and would feel obligated to respect.
but as much as she deserves her agency, and the right to make her own decisions, she is still a child. he cannot in good conscience send her back to miserable conditions without offering everything he can first to assist her. ]
It will not be an easy transition, but I have resources. I will find a way, should you wish for it.
[ he doesn't want to control her fate. and there would quite a few logistical hurdles, but he does want to at least give her options where she sees none. ]
[ oh. oh, no. something painful twists in her chest. there is a burning sensation behind her eyes, but no tears fall. she closes her eyes before the sheen becomes too obvious.
his care hurts as much as it heals her. it shines on where she's been hollow. ]
I am trapped in my duty. I will not hide that fact. I do not want to abandon the people I have come to care about there, or here.
[ she has no true patriotic feelings for a country that has abandoned and imprisoned her, but she has too soft a heart to abandon people who have been good to her. ]
There are other worries I have, beyond my duty. [ she looks at their connected hands, and she coughs out petals that color her fear and resignation. ] I do not know if I... can live for long outside of my country.
[ CLOSES EYES BETWEEN THIS AND MEMSHARE. AHHH!!!! SHOUXUE!!!!!! AAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!
his hand curls tighter around hers. ]
...Your people are fortunate to have you.
[ but that's not all there is to it, unfortunately. something cold drops into the pit of his stomach when she coughs up petals. for a moment—just for a moment—he feels a tickle at his throat. the feelings of despair blooming afresh in his chest.
he's quiet for a moment, emotion flickering across his tense gaze. but he forces himself to swallow down what misgivings he has. he will not lose hope, especially not in front of her. ]
[ she would not say they are fortunate when she does so little, when she thinks there isn't much she can do.
his question makes her pause because no one has ever phrased it that way. it's not right, but from what she's learned recently before coming here, it may not be wrong either. ]
When I was chosen to become the Raven Consort, that was a sign that the goddess, Niao Lian, claimed me. If I leave, she will take it as a sign of betrayal, and I will die.
[ in some ways, she is more like a sacrifice than cursed. ]
I do not know if I can escape her.
[ on account of their souls now being intermingled. ]
There may still be a way. I do not mean to offer empty promises, but everything we've seen and experienced has been beyond impossible. We walk among individuals who conjure miracles without so much as batting an eye.
[ so many aboard this ship with powers and capabilities beyond his understanding. it doesn't feel right to him, that there would be no means to help her at all. ]
...Would that I could help you myself, and those you care for. [ but he understands that is not his battle to fight. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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she picks up her tea and takes a drink. ]
... I am not able to travel far.
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...Is there something on your mind? Eunhyuk said it might ease our symptoms, if we don't withhold our thoughts.
...But only if you'd like to share.
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It isn't something that is on my mind. It is only... the things I know I am unable to do.
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[ ... ]
Are you still determined to go back?
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If there's a way for you to come back with me to Teyvat, you are welcome.
[ but the last they spoke of this, she'd said she hadn't wanted to abandon her duty. which is unfortunately something he can also understand, and would feel obligated to respect.
but as much as she deserves her agency, and the right to make her own decisions, she is still a child. he cannot in good conscience send her back to miserable conditions without offering everything he can first to assist her. ]
It will not be an easy transition, but I have resources. I will find a way, should you wish for it.
[ he doesn't want to control her fate. and there would quite a few logistical hurdles, but he does want to at least give her options where she sees none. ]
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his care hurts as much as it heals her. it shines on where she's been hollow. ]
I am trapped in my duty. I will not hide that fact. I do not want to abandon the people I have come to care about there, or here.
[ she has no true patriotic feelings for a country that has abandoned and imprisoned her, but she has too soft a heart to abandon people who have been good to her. ]
There are other worries I have, beyond my duty. [ she looks at their connected hands, and she coughs out petals that color her fear and resignation. ] I do not know if I... can live for long outside of my country.
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his hand curls tighter around hers. ]
...Your people are fortunate to have you.
[ but that's not all there is to it, unfortunately. something cold drops into the pit of his stomach when she coughs up petals. for a moment—just for a moment—he feels a tickle at his throat. the feelings of despair blooming afresh in his chest.
he's quiet for a moment, emotion flickering across his tense gaze. but he forces himself to swallow down what misgivings he has. he will not lose hope, especially not in front of her. ]
Have you been cursed...?
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his question makes her pause because no one has ever phrased it that way. it's not right, but from what she's learned recently before coming here, it may not be wrong either. ]
When I was chosen to become the Raven Consort, that was a sign that the goddess, Niao Lian, claimed me. If I leave, she will take it as a sign of betrayal, and I will die.
[ in some ways, she is more like a sacrifice than cursed. ]
I do not know if I can escape her.
[ on account of their souls now being intermingled. ]
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There may still be a way. I do not mean to offer empty promises, but everything we've seen and experienced has been beyond impossible. We walk among individuals who conjure miracles without so much as batting an eye.
[ so many aboard this ship with powers and capabilities beyond his understanding. it doesn't feel right to him, that there would be no means to help her at all. ]
...Would that I could help you myself, and those you care for. [ but he understands that is not his battle to fight. ]
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[ she does think there are possibilities, but part of her problem is in whether she thinks she should accept those possibilities.
her emotions are a tangle of guilt and atonement. ]
... That you care is enough.